Pushing

This week has been very interesting to, say the least. I think the kids are starting to feel out the boundraies and today they started to "push" us as a staff. I had to really take into considerationt hat this is not personal...This isnt about me and they arent trying to do anything personally, they are just trying to ease back into the roles they have lead in their life up to this point.....Basically, the Honeymoon is over!

So today, I pushed back with accountability and a desire for them to improve and overcome....There were multiple violations and it was like it literally happened overnight.

Now consider this whole project....WE ARE A COMMUNITY!!!! So when one is struggling in the community, it affects the WHOLE community....

Today I wrote up 19 violations to 16 of the students (No, that isnt a typo)... Not only is this difficult as a case manager because you have to be able to be stern and firm but still empowiring and showing how much you care and believe in them....PLUS take the portion of the problem that DOESNT relate to the programand put it aside....It really is very tedious!

Now as a result, MOST were pretty upset with the write ups and the facts around the write ups and ultimately with me as I issued ALL OF THEM personally....This was like a huge RIPPLE into this community and before long, I could see and feel the entire team start to get frustrated....As a result, people started to subconciously react to the ripple and this sparked a couple of more write ups to those acting out as a result of the ripple.... So today, I was THE asshole!!

Now I have a saying I firmy believe in and that is....

"Sometimes being a stand looks like being an asshole"

I made sure at every critical point of every write up that no matter what, my desire is to see them succeed and that this is simply a direction to help them continue on the path for that success and break old trends.

I even told one of the kids today....

"Look man, every choice you have made up to this point has gotten you to this EXACT point. If you are happy with this point in your life, go live large, BUT you WILL NOT live that way in this program...AND if you are happy with the result, why are you here? This program doesnt work that way. We are here to show you "different" and how to pursue your goals "differently" and with purpose. If you think you can create that doing what you have done to this point, then get your ass up out of that chair and go make it happen OUT THERE....This isnt the way this program works.... This is YOUR program but realize, WE RUN THIS SHOW and the reason we do is because we have gone your path, got your results and learned how to do it differently...We are here to coach you to that. So with that, you have to swallow your pride, listen to what we say and trust....OR NOT!! You make the choice but make it right now because you arent helping yourself or this team!"

He was uncomfortable with this direct approach but the reality is that he couldnt argue it.... so he took it in, pissed, upset, frustrated....And when we got to the end, I had him turn to me, I stuck out my hand and I said...

"Look man, if you have 6 people out there in the world that support you 100% to reach your goals, then go be with them....I am 45 years old and I dont know that I have 6 people fully committed to making MY dreams happen....This is a lifetime opportunity, and I want to see you succeed!"

He turned, hestantly shook my hand, was still irritated, but he shook my hand and left the room....THINKING!!

1 hour later, without my coaching, he went and made ammends to the person this whole situation started with.....FRIGGIN SCORE MAN!!! Maybe that was an "in the park homer" but it was still a homerun!!

He was HARD, he was proud, but he was thinking, seeing, becoming aware....Man, its those little seeds...he will remember this for some time, of that I am confident!

It was a really rough day...The kids were gathering and gossiping about all of the write ups, they were all saying how wrong this or that was...etc.... But all that big talk is great because tonight, and from this point forward, these kids are starting to understand that we are committed, NO SHIT, IN YOUR FACE, COMMITTED to them and their success in this program.....

So this has been an experiemnt.... I knew I had to go in and risk these kids not liking me for this (which is hard, because I dont like being disliked...I LOVE THESE KIDS!!) but I know that the aftermath will secure something I told them from the beginning....I am sticking to my word....I told them...

"I will shoot you straight, no smoke blown up your ass, and be direct..."

Thats what I did today....

It will be interesting to see how the next few days unfold....Will kids be standoffish to me? Will they come and try to make good with me??? With they avoid me, seek me...... I know that all I did today truly came form my heart and with a desire for them ALL to succeed....I AM CONFIDENT that if this is your intention above all else, you have to trust the process that what goes out, comes back to you.

So stay tuned, I am exhausted and confident I handled it the best I could, with the intention for them to learn and grow....Not discipline and hold down.....

OWTFDWIT!!!!